End Of The War

After two weeks torturing in the classroom struggling with papers, I can finally take a break and release my mind which has been vexed by too many feelings. The holiday is on the corner, retrospecting what we had gone through, May is certainly a season filled with torture and challenge--a season of indulgence and a season to say "welcome" and "goodbye".

At the very moment our dear Chinese teacher Benny Ng retrieved my Chinese Literature paper from my trembling hands, I knew that the battle was over, a battle which I had hoped so badly for it to over...It is not that I think tests are not necessary, actually, they are highly important tools to motivate us to wark hard, and......highly USEFUL benchmark for teachers to "judge" us, and......highly crutial evidence that we are studying, instead of idling around with a bleak future awaiting us. However, facing this kind of marathon, any deny of the presence of stress and nervousness is proved to be false. We strive to welcome it with joy and confidence, yet at the end of it there is absence of relief and excitement...

It is over?

It is OVER!!

If it is over, let it be over~~~

Sounds pessimistic, however, there are reasons for me to drop those unrealistic optimism ( although I have promised millions of times to stick to it, until the end of the Mid-Year it suddenly dauned on me that it was not realistic) For Mid-year, I tried my best...and it is hard to give a general feeling about it, the results have not come out yet, so it is not time to mourn or celebrate.

In retrospect, in the past three years every time after the crutial examination, I would spend the rest of the day going out with my parents, discussing the answers with my sister, and indulging in the most tantalising dishes that the most skillful chefs could provide; I would lie idly on the bed, side by side with my sister, father and mother, emptying my brain which had been crammed with too much knowledge and pressure; I would keep cycling the whole afternoon, letting the wind howl beside my ears, letting the coldness pierce through my body, rendering me numb......

Here, on the equator, there is no parents to go out with, there is no courage to discuss the answers, there is no enough money to indulge, there is no space to lie down, stretching my limbs, there is no bicycle, no piercing wind, no invisible imps mumbling to you at the silent night...

There is interminable leaving.My friends(except my dear Candy, a lovely and meek creature) are leaving, they are immersed in indescribable joy and excitement, they are heading for their paradise, they are swarming towards their territories, they are in the seventh heaven, packing with trembling hands. That is just the prologue, two more unexpected departures are the real thing that stabbed my heart, rendering me sorrowful and speechless~~~My two dearest, most affable, most venerable and most caring principals are leaving, too. Their tickets have been prepared and departure dates fixed, indicating that it is INDEED a season of saying goodbye.

Three weeks ago, I read Daniel's story"saying goodbye", it was riveting and moving, yet fictional...now, the real leaving is impending, after the END OF THE WAR, after all these torture, all these mutual encouragement, after all these days insanely biting those textbooks and worksheets in the cold study room(sometimes playing the piano in the music room:), after all these suffering of stress and uncertainty, after all these periods of writing crazily, we have really to say "goodbye".

Maths Olympics is at the end of the May, for which I still have to study hard on my Maths. I participate in the Open Group, so it will be more challenging and exciting.

Next week our results will gradually come out, may there be more tears, or more laughter? Time will tell, so "let it be"~~~

(It does not matter whether we reach the PEAK or not, what matters is that we HAVE EMBARKED)

So, strive on...