Smell the Flowers

With the last marked paper falling into our hands, the End of Year was over. Everything. Anxiety and hope, excitedness and sleepless nights. It is always easy to exaggerate the difficulties that are in store for you but hard to remain composed when you are supposed to. This time, I can only say that I am glad to gain both joy and regrets, which gave me a blow while kept me going on without losing my heart.

I still appreciate that the first two papers I got were a huge blow. It struck an alarm within me that kept my following holidays unsettled. Chinese Literature and Higher Chinese, which are my strengths, maded me feel like Napoleon Bonaparte after the Battle of Waterloo. Most people are bewitched by the marks, but I learnt an important lesson in these two papers: never be complacent, always practice and communicate with fellow learners. The lack of information on ancient mythology was a big strike basically because I failed to interact with others on some topics, which resulted in lossing marks on a massive scale. Locking oneself in an empty room and trying to ruminate the essence of Chinese Literature is impossible, pair-work and group discussion are the ways. Likewise, being too confident in dealing with Chinese paper is not at all wise. My summary hit its historical low due to my misconception, which was partially caused by lack of practice. One cannot use "no time" as the reason all the time, one cannot seek salvage in self-illusion, one must not depend upon "being wise on the spot" because once you fail to pracitise, the possibility of making stupid mistakes "on the spot" will greatly increase.

This also applys for my History and Social Studies. Preoccupied by the structured-essay questions, I did not even allot a single afternoon for my source-based questions, not even a last-minute revision. This proved to be a serious misstep. However I greatly appreciate it. I appreciate my loss in marks. If teachers let me get away with flying colours without paying sufficient efforts, I would develop the illusion that SBQ was absolutely de-texted, thus would continue on the wrong track and pave way for the ultimate fiasco.

I need to feel the pain...when I am still young enough to afford to feel it.

One subject I have to serious blame myself is Maths. Both Maths I did not do up to my expectation partly because of complacency. E-Maths paper one should be a reminder all the time. It is a paper in which carelessness can be fatal. There is no exaggeration here. In a simple paper when every concept is obvious, it is always hardest to illustrate or show the concept to the fullest. "Details determine a person." I should not be contented when paying attention to details is still my plaguing weakness. A-Maths became my laughing stock because though I had almost 30 minutes to check for errors, I slip into my old mindset and fail to detect a single error when I had plenty of them. What revealled here was that I need to reconsider my attitude towards maths. It looks for details. Always and forever. Facing with questions that make you sratch your head, you should not give in.

I need to learn from my mistakes, that is why an examination can make the best lesson ever. I appreciate it for letting me know my weaknesses, bit by bit, once for a time, until ultimately i can grow out of them. That is what learning is all about.

However, though it is necessary to learn from mistakes, it is not at all wise to fall in the same banana skin over and over again.

And beyond studying, I have a lot to learn, which I have the confidence to handle it well with so many responsible and assiduous role models by my side.

Let's leave all the marks to yesterday and strive for tomorrow.

That is what really counts.

"Sleeping on your old fetes can only make those fetes to stale, decompose, and be devaluated, so be awake, and be a good forerunner. Do not disappoint yourself."

I shall keep that as my mental note.